People are eager to learn how to win but ignore how to lose. Who wants to know defeat? Do not bet if you can’t take a rout
And yet, losing requires more mastery than winning, as it is much more dangerous. This is the time to pay the price.
If you are not ready to pay a price you are too weak to start taking risk in the first place.
Paradoxically, a bad loser is not of the winners. So, you learn to lose as a part of learning to win.
You better know in advance what to do when you lose.
The simple thing to keep in mind is that you do not need to perish each time you fail something. The wheel will keep turning, there will be ups and downs, as long as you live.
You may even take advantage from the occasion of loss; losing with grace and courage will not only ease loss or help you out of failure, but also build up your credibility and the respect of other people - the substance of future success.
Your character may be gilded glittering by success but it is when you lose that people feel who you are. Defeat, not victory is when quality shows. The stumbling reveals the person. Strangely, you can win a lot while you lose. Resilience and style in adversity gain respect even while you fail. Now, be noble if you can, but certainly do not be mean, or ugliness will stick to you.
If you are strong while you lose, "If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster and treat those two impostors just the same" [1 ] people will grow confident that there is someone inside and you will win later.
If you do not forsake your friends, nor bite around in fear, people will know that you are trustworthy.
Have the courage to check your pride and to limit damage. Let people witness how you become a better person. Learn then to say swiftly: “if this brings me down let me see what works.”
You see the difference of quality in a glance; the cheap one denies the fault, justifies it and worst of all persists in it, even for years. The strong and the skilled will acknowledge, stop the part of harm that depends on them and start immediately what is needed to repair or do better, at least, not to do worse. Say “yes, I was wrong” or “yes, you are stronger” “I am sorry, please excuse me!” Even enemies respect this.
The weak will waste precious time to explain away the flagrant; I saw so many too defensive to concede defeat or error, too cowardly to face the consequences or the shame. They made after one error another one, even two, to cover it or to deny it, persisting, obstinate to justify, not to lose face, until the spiral escaped out of control. The mistake became a large error. The scratch became a wound, the wound became deadly.
Prevent the flood, just say “Stop! This does not work. This dream was mistaken. Let us do better.” Or, don't say anything, just leave the place, now. If needed, run! Try another life; when you cannot change things out of your power, you can always change yourself.
The art of losing is also a ritual of burial, of writing off what you invested from your heart, a rite of parting
. If you fail to finish, close, end, put to rest what failed, you would carry the burden forever. Unfinished business sticks to the mind for years and the cup of loss not emptied is bottomless. Draw a dignified line, offer a respectful rite of passage for what was, start a new chapter.
Good losing is a unique occasion of learning from experience because what you understand now you will not forget. An educated loser must conclude a defeat by examining what worked and what to avoid, with wisdom for the future and experience to nourish the later moments when you will say: “This reminds me of...” The bad loser who neglected the work of understanding only remembers bitterness, unfinished business and hatred.
Skill in a time of loss in certainly not giving up; it combines courage, humility and patience with untiring resilience in following your deeper course; like the water of Tao, temporarily evaporated into clouds, or frozen or muddied, which will lie dormant as long as needed, without struggle, but will flow it’s natural course to where it belongs, at the first occasion when the way is open.
 Rudyard Kipling, If